Negative Sentiments Detract

Our backgrounds and experiences shape the way we value and associate with the items we own. Each of us comes from a different generation, area, cultural background, and upbringing, and these diverse influences affect our thoughts, values, and perspectives on what we choose to keep. Every item we possess also has its own history—it comes from a generation, a place, a culture, and carries memories of how we acquired it and the moments we associate with it.

Most people don’t spend much time reflecting on these associations, perhaps because they don’t want to “waste” their time thinking about such things. But understanding these connections can help us release the unconscious obligations we create for ourselves. Just because we value certain items sentimentally doesn’t mean they bring us positive value; they can also evoke negative feelings and even promote bad habits.

We often hold onto items because we think they are valuable, because they were left to us, or because they symbolize the legacy of our loved ones. Sometimes, we keep things simply because we’re too lazy to get rid of them or exchange them for something better. Speaking from personal experience, I’ve owned certain things that evoked negative feelings and even fostered negative habits.

For example, I had a retail store that initially felt like a blessing but eventually became a burden due to the challenges of profiting during a down economy. What started as a positive venture conditioned me to associate it with feelings of imprisonment. Similarly, I had a truck that I worked very hard with, but it didn’t bring much financial reward. Selling it was a relief, freeing me from the memories and habits I had developed from using it as a daily driver. The truck’s capabilities and rugged condition often led me to rely more on physical effort than on my mind.

These experiences taught me that our possessions can limit us, preventing us from acquiring things that could bring more value to our lives. Since we can’t have it all, it’s crucial to be selective in what we own—choosing items that evoke inspiration and happiness can significantly improve our environment. Functional items that are difficult to use tend to be used less, while things that are easy to use promote more frequent and enjoyable use.

One way to change our associations with certain items is to put our own touch on them, whether through painting, altering, or customizing them. Our associations are often visual, so changing the appearance of an item can disrupt the negative emotions it evokes. By making an item truly ours—like customizing a home by moving walls or adding rims to a car—we can transform it into a representation of the expression we want to be known for.

Of course, not everything needs to be changed. Some things we like just the way they are, and we can accept them as is. But for items or properties associated with traumatic experiences, sometimes it’s best to get rid of them altogether. Whether it’s a car with a tainted image, a home where trauma occurred, or a pen from someone who gave you negative feelings, you can always trash it or sell it and replace it with something that might change your world.

Only through reflection did I realize how certain things I valued actually evoked negative feelings and led to undesirable habits. Keeping these items—whether a house, car, decor, paraphernalia, or any other physical object—can affect how we feel. To maintain positive associations, we must change our relationship with these items, which may be easy or impossible depending on who we are.

I used to keep certain things my parents acquired, thinking I was preserving our family history. However, I eventually realized that these items were detracting value from my life because I didn’t have the resources to keep them. After many moves and pointlessly shuffling these items around, I noticed that none of my family members missed the “antiques” or “collectibles” I had saved. It was truly just me trying to preserve my family history and the things I grew up with. It became clear how pointless this was when I realized that all my family members are still alive, and none of them ever asked about the things I had saved.

Life situations often force people to part with things, but many would rather let these items gather dust than try to sell or get rid of them.